TRYING TO ROCK THE ONLY MODEST OUTFIT I COULD FIND AT THE MALL

modesty

Based off Emily’s #christiangirlproblem: “When cute clothes aren’t modest. Total drag.”

Thanks for sharing, Emily (http://4and1and3.wordpress.com/)!

WHEN YOU’RE DATING A GUY AND HE TRIES TO GET YOU TO DO SOMETHING YOU DON’T WANT TO DO

oh hello to the no

And then you’re like:

get out

And when he doesn’t listen:

punching shark layered

If you bop a shark on the nose and it swims away, it must also work on human males.

Based off Laura’s #christiangirlproblem: “Feeling pressured by men to do something you don’t want to do because of your beliefs. This is a big big big one!”

Thanks for sharing, Laura (http://scribblesandwanderlust.wordpress.com/)!

Conversations that carry a lot of wait

my-life-is-buffering

G:

I feel like you and I have had three very distinct conversations over my lifetime.

There’s the “Hello, can you hear me now?” conversation:

m: “Hey God, it’s me. m.”

[Silence]

m: “Hey God, not sure if you heard me the first time. It’s me, m!”

[Silence]

m: “Are we having a bad connection? Perhaps you’re on the prayer line with another person right now? Maybe I should pray back later?”

[Silence]

m: “OK—just humor me. Send me a sign that I will have a new job by June. Have my favorite song come on the radio. Or a knock on my apartment door. Have my phone ring… now!”

[Silence]

m: “I just realized my phone was on silent. Let’s try this again… and GO!”

[Silence]

And the “Is the neon blinking light not obvious enough” conversation:

m: “So, I’ve been thinking…”

G: “Just wait.”

m: “But I have this great idea!”

G: “Just wait.”

m: “But if I—”

G: “Just wait.”

m: “But how long do I have to wait?!”

G: “Just wait.”

m: “Have you seen the white hairs popping up on my head?! Do I need to start asking for a walker for my birthday? Some orthopedic shoes? Dentures?!”

G: “Just wait.”

m: “GUYS DO NOT MAKE OUT WITH GIRLS WHO HAVE DENTURES!”

G: “Just wait.”

m: “Okay, listen. Have you seen what happens to me when it’s 6:00 PM and I haven’t had any dinner yet and my blood sugar is low and so is my patience? Hm?”

G: “Have you read any of the Old Testament?”

m: “Touché.”

And then sometimes there’s the “I hear what you’re saying and I’m actually OK with it” conversation:

m: “Sup, G!”

G: “Yo, lil’ m.”

m: “I’ve been thinking. I have a few ideas of what this next year will look like. Writing wise. Job wise. Church wise.”

G: “Don’t make any plans. Mine are better.”

m: “You know what, you are probably right.”

G: “I’m always right. Foresight 20/20.”

m: “Right eye -7.5 and left eye -6.5. Hindsight 20/20.”

G: “Which is why you need me—you are almost legally blind.”

m: (sings) “’Twas blind but now I see!!”

[Silence]

m: “G?”

G: “You’ll sing better when you get to heaven.”

M: “OK, so the plan is to just wait and let you lead me where you want me to go.”

G: “That’s the plan.”

m: “Jeremiah 29:11!”

G: “Thanks, I know– helped Jeremiah write it. Divine inspiration.”

Today, I’m happy with you just telling me to wait.

Your child,

m

WHEN I THINK ABOUT THE IDEA OF ACTUALLY GETTING MARRIED

scared baby

Based off Elyse’s #christiangirlproblem: “Fear. When/if God brings my dreamboat along, setting sail into the sunset is pretty scary! I’ve been single for a long time and haven’t dated anyone since being saved (2.5 years ago). Am I ready to date? If so, what will that even look like?”

Thanks for sharing, Elyse (http://standoutscripture.blogspot.com/)!

A shout out to all my single ladies!

thank you phil

A special thank you to all the ladies who shared their #christiangirlproblems on my post “Attention, all you single christian ladies!”

As a special shout out, I will be featuring one of your #christiangirlproblems on my blog throughout the week!

So stay tuned! And thanks for sharing in this great stage of life together!

– m

PS. If you haven’t had a chance to comment on the post yet– it’s not too late! I’d love to hear your #christiangirlproblems!

7 BIBLICALLY THEMED SCENTED CANDLES THAT RIVAL THE SMELL OF FRIED CHICKEN

fried chicken

photo: usatoday.com

FEATURE STORY

GRAND RAPIDS—Watch out Yankee Candle, there’s a new line of candles in town.

Following the Kentucky Fried Chicken candle craze that sold out within minutes, and the stink-tacular success of “The Stinky Candle Company,” Zondervan has announced they are launching their own line of biblically themed scented candles.

Next time your small group is studying Exodus, why not fill the air with the aroma of a candle from the limited edition “Escape from Egypt” collection. Best sellers include:

The Ten Plagues Candle

A touch of gnat, a dash of frog, and a hint of blood, this blend of aromas is a must for any Old Testament study. Made with real locusts!

Pillars Pillar Candle

Made with special patented technology, this pillar candle smells like smoke during the day and fire at night. It’s like two candles for the price of one!                 

Manna Madness Candle

Think the “French Baguette” candle from Bath and Body Works smells like the real deal? Well you’ll be praying for bread to drop out of the sky after you light this candle up!

Even though Christmas is over, you’ll want to check out the candles on clearance from the “Emmanuel” collection and stock up for next year:

Silent Night Candle

Enjoy a calm evening by the glow of the Christmas tree while the smells of hay, sheep, and donkey feces fill the room. It’s like you’re swaddled right there in the manger with baby Jesus!

The Gift of the Magi Candle

What does frankincense smell like? Wonder no more! This careful concoction of frankincense, gold, and myrrh is well worth the wait of up to 2 years in estimated arrival time from the date of purchase.

Celebrating the life of Jesus, Zondervan also added in the “Miracles” collection:

Five Thousand Candle

Upon first glance, you would never think this small votive candle is capable of burning for up to an unprecedented amount of 5,000 hours. But once you waft the succulent scents of a couple fish and a few loaves of bread, your doubts will vanish.

Party’s Not Over Candle

Don’t think all is lost when you see this clear candle. While it may appear to be the color of water, once lit it changes to a deep red hue and soon you’ll smell the sweet scent of fermented grapes. (WARNING: Please do not ingest.)

So next time you sit down for your morning devotional or gather in a friend’s living room for bible study, think about purchasing one of these candles to really get into the spiritually scented spirit. But you better act fast—with candles like these, Zondervan expects to sell out of their first run within the next 30 years.

ATTENTION, all you single christian ladies!

ESTROGEN ALERT: Sorry fellas, you can just glaze over this post and check back tomorrow. 😉

If you happen to be in possession of two X chromosomes, you know there are a lot of great things that come with being a girl.

But alas, life as a girl is not without its host of problems. Especially if you are of the single Christian girl variety.

And problems seem to always go better with a hashtag in front of them.

So ladies, I’d love to know:

what is your problem

This blog has taught me a lot of things, including a refresher course in geography. I’m super blessed and excited that I have devoted followers from all over the world—a special shout out to my peeps in Switzerland, the Philippines, Canada, Australia, and the UK (just to name a few!).

And I want to hear from all of you!

Whether it’s an awkward encounter with an ex in the Alps or your problem always ends in: “eh?” I want to hear it in the comments section below! Let’s share the fun, awkward, exciting, embarrassing, ridiculous, weird, and unique problems to being in this stage of life together!

Submit your TOP THREE #christiangirlproblems in the comments section of this post with the format:

#1

#2

#3

FIRST NAME:

COUNTRY:

Looking forward to sharing our #christiangirlproblems!

-m